Radio Silence.

I haven't meant to be completely silent lately. I'm working on confronting things that stress me, and becoming active rather than an ostrich when it gets hard.

It's been baby steps.

I mentioned dealing with anxiety before, trying to find natural approaches and working through it. Or at least in my head I was going to work through it. After more sleepless nights than restful ones, week long anxiety attacks, and the feeling that I was falling into a pit that I couldn't crawl my way out of, I finally talked to my doctor.

I'm still working through a lot and feel like I have a long road ahead of me, but at least I feel like I'm making progress.

At the same time my daughter has been making progress with a diagnosis. We have more testing this month to see what we can do about her comprehension issues and figure out how to work with her. I think that it hit me, while going through all this testing to help her, that she wasn't weak just because she needed help- so I shouldn't feel weak for asking for it myself.

We learn a lot from our children.

I promise you- I'm still here!

It's the end of the school year, which meant a lot to me last year when I graduated- but still means that the next few weeks will be really busy!

I was camping with the Troop last weekend, then started the week running.

This weekend we took a zoo trip with the Troop after also working for a Veteran's luncheon the day before. Add in dinner with the in-laws and I need a weekend to recover (again).

This week does not appear to be a break.

Monday: My baby will graduate from a Tiger Cub to a Wolf Cub as well as try to get the paperwork from our Scout Service Unit.

Tuesday: I have a Webinar to watch bright and early, then the IEP meeting for my daughter, and ending the evening with an all-troop meeting.

Wednesday: My daughter has further testing to see if we can figure out what is going on with her processing.

Thursday: After work, I go back to work for a carnival (where I'll be working a booth).

Friday: I sleep. After work, that is.

All of that is in addition to working each day, feeding the family, homework/housework, and possibly adding a second job. I'm trying not to feel completely overwhelmed by the week ahead. I know that won't help at all- but put all out there in black and white makes it seem like a lot.

The good thing is that I have a little over 2 "weeks" of work (11 days, though 2 I'm out of work!), but then the warp speed of summer will begin.

I hope I keep up. Thank you for being patient with me, I feel like I get to handling everything just in time for something to knock me off my roll.

Wisdom Wednesday: Retention

This isn't an easy subject for me to talk about. It's one that I didn't anticipate having to deal with personally at all.

My daughter learns differently than others. She has since she was a toddler. She was in First Steps (an early intervention service in Indiana) until she aged out of the program, focusing on speech because she did not talk. She was in Speech through the school system from 3- present day. She, through lots of hard work, did well in Kindergarten through the first half of First Grade. Then it started going downhill.

I thought the change in schools caused the dip, but it turned out that reading comprehension is something that she struggles with. At first it only affected her reading grade. She could memorize spelling words, math was not difficult, so her grades were still okay through second grade (though dropping each grade period). At the end of second grade she was tested by the school psychologist and had high non-verbal intelligence, but verbal intelligence was well below where it should be.

Enter Third grade. Reading comprehension is not just for the weekly story. Math includes story problems (and algebra) that is difficult to understand if you can't process what you read. Science, History, and other subjects test on the material read. Spelling words stop following the phonetic rules (or common rule breakers). She is assessed constantly through standardized testing.

Right now it looks like she will repeat the Third grade, only I don't have a game plan. Every effort we are making (the school, and us at home) is only causing more stress without any change in grades. She had referrals to be tested from her doctor and we're in the waiting game portion.

What are your opinions about retention? If you have any resources I can turn to about processing disorders, I would appreciate them. I feel like I don't even know where to start with this, and I feel like her school feels the same.

The not-so-frugal aspect of the Library

One minute with a 1 year old budding artist and a rogue crayon, and now we are the owners of a $14.99 book.

So yeah, the Library is awesome. Until it isn't ;)

Finally getting there!

I am in my final week of Student Teaching and will walk at graduation next week! I'm so excited. This has been 7 years in the making and I have had 2 more kids (3 total) while in school. I am so happy to be at the end of this journey and at the start of a new one.

I know that I would not have made it this far if I wasn't able to find ways to be frugal. I am grateful to all the blogs that I've followed during this time because I have learned so much. I'm excited to make this blog a bit more active now that I may have more than 10 minutes to sit at the computer daily.

I have learned many frugal ways to have fun while teaching and I'm excited to share these with you! Plus I hope to offer more reviews, freebies, and giveaways!

Thank you for joining me on this journey and I'm excited to move on with you all as well!

Hangin' In there!

Student teaching has taken over my life! I'm out of the house from 7:30am until 3:30 pm and rarely sit down before dinner, and then have to start the prep for the next day. I'm kind of flipping out because my portfolio still isn't done and I have a lot of stuff to get together before I can finish it. It's really hard to balance being a mom of 3 and going to school full time while student teaching. I just hope I make it out with a bit of my sanity intact ;)

BUT on a happy note, we found out that our fish had babies! The kids were playing "dead fish math" (they constantly talk about how "we had 6 fish but then 2 died so now we have 4!") and my husband noticed a few extra ones swimming around in there!



Three of our six newbies!

So even in the midst of stress and life, sometimes you get a sweet surprise. I hope that you get one today too :) Though maybe not in the form of extra fish ;)

Week 2- Done!

Ever have one of those weeks where you're afraid to think "what else can go wrong?" because you really, REALLY don't want to find out? That was my week last week.

The adrenaline from the first week of Student Teaching had worn off so I started the week exhausted. I also had 2 sick kiddos (at different times), grocery shopping, a van that will not start, and a husband that worked all but 2 days of the week. It makes you feel like you're swimming upstream, and the current just got stronger.

This weekend I tried to prepare better for the week. I've prepped meals (precooked chicken, ground beef, and made pizza dough) so that I can easily dump stuff into the crock pot or heat for meals. Nothing fancy is on the menu, but at least it'll be food, right?

I am also going to pick out my outfits for the week (and for the kids this week) so that we have no surprises or scrambles to get ready in the morning. I've developed a routine of showering and getting my hair ready at night so that I don't have to fit it in my morning routine (since even with my best intentions, plans fall apart as quickly as they are made).

I do love this though. I'm tired, busy, and stressed but I love working in the classroom.

First Week- Complete!

My life has been a whirlwind lately! You may notice that I will post a few blog entries, then have some lag between new ones. This is because I have started my journey in student teaching! I've learned that balancing being out of the house all day + 3 children is no easy feat, but I also can see how being organized and keeping a routine can make even the most hectic days have some semblance of order.

I love working in the classroom. Any doubts I may have had about what to do with my life go away the minute I start working with the children. I already love my class (see? MY class, and I've been there a week!) and am so excited to be working with them.

I'm less excited about creating a portfolio and keeping up with the assignments in other courses, but I expected that. It is worth it to be in the classroom though, I am thrilled that I can finally put everything I have been studying into practice.

New Year Life Changes

I joke that this month is when I begin to be a "real" grown up. I will be out of the house daily, away from the internet and comforts of home (see my priorities? ha!). I will have to manage the household on less time than I'm accustomed to, on even less money than usual, and with less time with my kids. Does this make me a "real" grown up? Have I met the qualifications yet?

I actually think that I've been a "real" one for almost 10 years now. College has become a time for young adults to discover who they are and choose who they want to be when they grow up. My college experience has been a little different. I won't say that it has been more difficult, because that isn't fair. I can't compare to what I don't know. The struggles I face do not make the struggles others have faced less significant just because I am a parent. All I know is what I've experienced. I've had to pull all-nighters not just because of exams, but because my day was spent caring for a sick child. I've had to manage when babysitters bail, when deadlines sneak up, and when vehicles breakdown at the worst time possible. I've spent the past 7 years of my education with a chip on my shoulder.

I've felt like I've had something to prove. That I needed to not only do well in school and finish to be something, but that I had to be the best at it too. That doing so will prove my worth to those who were hurtful and critical. I still struggle with that, though I feel like each day I am more able to let go of the hurt and thrive in being myself. I'm scared of what comes after graduation. I've defined myself as a student for so long that I'm not sure of who I am without that label.

I'm also excited. I am happy that this part of my journey is coming near an end so I can begin my next adventure. I know that I'm not where I thought I would be at 27, but that doesn't mean I don't like where I've ended up :)

Life is a Marathon

I was so proud of myself Monday. I arranged childcare and got two assignments completed.

Then Tuesday rolled around and I had to get groceries, pick up pictures to start more Christmas gifts, go to Walmart for some odds and ends, then clean the house. The afternoon consisted of walking the girlie to Girl Scouts and taking the boys to the park. After they were finally in bed for the night, I got to watch Glee (it's an obsession at this point).

I feel like it was such a productive day, but I got no assignments done. I didn't even crack open a textbook. On Monday I felt like I should be able to have those results daily, but I know it's not possible. My education, like life, is a marathon. Some days I make a lot of headway while others I'm just slowly plugging along. My mom even commented on Facebook:

"That is how your school work is going to be - in spurts rather than steady progress but in the end it will all be done. Good job."

It really helped me see that I am making progress, the little victories are meaningful, and when I am unable to cross assignments off my list it isn't because I'm lazy. It's because I have other roles to fill. 


I have hope that I'll get a textbook open today (though if the clingy baby on my lap is any indication- that may not happen). Even if I don't, I will get this done :)

Lack of Sleep Saga Continues

Ever have one of those mornings that just fall apart? Mine started last night.

I could barely fall asleep, I'm not sure why, but I knew that my husband was going to have to get up early so I wanted to try to sleep since I know that he's usually not the quietest person. We usually have opposite shifts, but today was going to be different.

Finally I fall asleep, but at 3:45am his alarm goes off. Of course I wake up, and then of course the baby wakes up. I try to convince him to go back to sleep but once he sees Daddy it's all overwith.

So now it's 2:30pm and I feel like it should be bed time. I haven't even made dinner, cleaned up the house, or helped the kids with homework. The baby who had to be up is taking his second nap, in my lap.

But even in my zombie daze, I'm excited for new opportunities that I've been given. I also am thankful that I got to have a lazy day, even if it was somewhat forced. I just hope all the caffeine that I've consumed doesn't backfire and make it impossible to sleep tonight.

How do you manage when you get no sleep? Coffee? Soda? Naps? Comment and let me know :)

Back to School! Journal Entry

To kind of cut between the reviews, savings, and frugal posts I plan to make a few journal entries a month. I don't plan on it being a daily, or even weekly, thing. Just occasional updates on my life :)

This week has been a pretty hectic one. It seems the moment that I think I have it all together and a plan- everything changes. I go with the flow pretty well, but some things end up suffering.

My kids started school on Tuesday. I now have a Kindergartener and a Second grader! I can hardly believe it. I thought that having them in school would open up so much free time. The first day started off great.I went out to coffee with my friends and even walked the mall (I hadn't been to the mall in so long!). Then I got home and started feeling gross. I blamed the Chinese food I splurged on, but after finding out others were getting sick I discovered it was a stomach bug.

There went my free time. I managed to keep the house somewhat picked up and tend to the baby, and that was about it. I couldn't even grocery shop because being surrounded by food was probably the worst place for me. So my lovely husband took over. He did the grocery shopping (and even mealplanned while he shopped!). He didn't set any savings records, but he did buy food for our family and I have a list of meals ready to prepare. Did I mention that he took all three children with him so I could rest? Love him.

I had to pull myself together to attend orientation at school the next day. I am finally a senior and see the light at the end of the 7 year tunnel of education. That took up most of my day, then when the kids came home I was on mom duty. The baby was with my husband all day while I was at school, and he let me know exactly what he thought about that when I got home. And today for that matter. He took a 4 hour nap on my lap- I think he is afraid that if I leave his sight for more than a moment that I won't come back.

Today was also my daughter's "school birthday" so I brought in cupcakes (I really don't like the store bought rule!) and got to meet her teacher again and see her class. That is one benefit to having such an early school year birthday. It's chaotic but I get in the classroom right away. I'm glad the bug has passed and that I got to be there.

So now I'm here typing this out while babysitting for a friend. This week has been a blur and I think it is a sign of what the year will be like.